Dealing With A Child Who Talks Back

As a parent, we always give our best to make our child perfect. We also want to ensure that the insecurities and inabilities that we have, they don't adopt. Every parent works hard to provide their children with the ideal nurturing environment to grow. So, whenever a child develops or adopts any bad habits and discipline, it is a big concern naturally for any parent.

The psychology of children is very complex, unique, and sensitive to understand and deal with. Therefore, when your child is talking back, your preliminary plan should be to understand the psychology behind it and then take steps according to that. Try and understand why is that behavior okay for them to behave. Why is it not a bad habit for them? However, here are a few tips that can help you deal with a child's back talking habit.

1. Be What You Want Them to Be

Although children are not very good at listening to their elders, they never fail at imitating them. Children are like a mirror. What you show them, they will reflect. Almost every child in the growing stage has supreme grasping power. They very easily catch and adopt habits, practices, and words. As a parent, you need to be extremely conscious of the very minute details of your child’s environment. What do they read, watch, observe or witness in the home or outside, and so on. If they see you or any other family member who talks back, they will adopt that too. Your children will become what you are, so be what you want them to be.

2. Teach Them How to Accept and Handle Disagreements Respectfully

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. It is very important to teach your child how to respectfully disagree with anybody, including you. Disagreements are normal, differences in opinion are okay, discussions are healthy. But being rude and aggressive while doing any of these three acts mentioned is back talking, and it is neither okay nor healthy. The academic curriculum of your child will not include the subjects of real life. It is your duty as a parent to teach them. These days there is a lot of help available for the same online even so, there will be nothing as profound and impactful as you having a good talk with them.

3. Observe, Analyze, and Evaluate Your Child’s Trigger Points

Dig deeper into your child’s behavioral patterns. Observe how, what, when, where, why, and at which point they get angry and backtalk. The more you observe these patterns, the more you see the precise root cause of this ill-habit of your child. Every child tends to develop certain insecurities depending on their age, especially in the times when social media platforms control and influence our lives a lot. Put efforts into determining their insecurities and guide them to get over them accordingly.

4. Stay Cool, Act Sane

There may be times when you can indulge in heated arguments with your child in serious situations. You may lose your temper due to your child’s mistreatment of you; it is highly possible. The fact is you are not the only parent dealing with a child who talks back, and you know it. So, you shouldn’t let the situation absorb your calm and sanity. Let’s face it; your anger is not going to fix anything certainly and also has chances to worsen the already worst situation. A child will listen to you only if they feel listened to; they will not feel listened to if you get angry and engage in heated arguments with them.

5. Address This Habit of Your Child, First Time Itself

Be very clear with your child what behavior is acceptable and what is not. The very first time you notice your child backtalking, confront them and talk with them right away. After that, you can take it lightly or ignore it since it happened just once. It is very significant to sit and have a healthy discussion with your child whenever you first observe them. It is much easier at that point to change their direction. Hence, always be on alert for that.

6. Have Patience In The Process

Every child is unique and special. Therefore, there cannot be a fixed roadmap to eradicate this habit for all children. The road to eliminating this habit from their behavior will change from child to child because its inception will be different for all. For some, it happens quickly; for others, it takes a long time. The factors like the child's age, how old the habit has been for them now, the reason behind them developing this habit, etc., will have a lot to do with the process. Therefore, it is pivotal that you be patient and make rational decisions as and when required for your child. Don't hurry and ruin the pace of the progress furthermore.

Whenever you lose hope and faith in this process, always remind yourself that it is easier to build up a child than repair an adult. It will keep you going and achieve your goal.